I’ve always held on to the belief that every opportunity and crisis in our lives boils down to a couple of choices. And what one chooses to do, maketh him. Put in simple words, our choices shapes our life. And that the problems in one’s life either makes him or breaks him, depending on what he is made of.
“We do not choose to be born. We do not choose our parents. We do not choose our historical epoch, the country of our birth or the immediate circumstances of our upbringing. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose the time and conditions of our death. But withing this realm of choicelessness, We do choose how to live” — Joseph Epstein
The theory sounds good. However, when put to practice, the complexities evolve. People have told me that we come to the crossroads where one will be faced with two options. The ‘Right Choice‘ and the ‘Lucrative Short Cut‘.
All my life, I’ve had the absolute clarity on the right path. Even before I had to make my choices, nine out of ten times I could distinguish the right choice from the wrong one. My concerns have been different for I’ve landed myself at the crossroads that threw up Multiple Paths and more than one Right Options. Problem was not distinguishing the right choice from the wrong one. It’s always been about the choosing one from among the several right choices.
The choice becomes all the more important when you know that it will affect your destiny. It’s always been easy for those who believed that their destiny is predetermined (or) is controlled by certain supernatural power that is beyond comprehension or control. The submissive minds have always chosen from among the option with a coolness and confidence that I’ve always envied. It is however the demanding minds (those that are particular about scripting their destiny) like mine that get get troubled. How can I be sure that the choice I am making is the most feasible option? How can I be sure about it to lead me to where I want to go?
Many people do not even realize they are at cross roads. Most of them do not even try to understand the nature of choices being put forth before them. I guess these folks are just happy to wander about in their lives. The destination simply doesn’t matter so much after all. But me, I ought to know where a road leads to for I’ve always started with an end in mind. I can pin-point in time the moments in which I were to make life-changing decisions. That one proposal you put forth… A certain telephonic conversation… That infinitesimal pause before either choosing to nod my head sideways or up-down.. The moment when you stand up and call a-spade a-spade etc..
No trumpets sound when the important decisions of our life are made. Destiny is made known silently. — Agnes DeMille
But at times, one finds better options along the way and that’s when the priorities change. It happens to everyone. As we see more things, our understanding improves and our aspirations seem to transcend beyond.
Now my theory had to be updated. I figure out that it’s impossible to know what exactly that you want in life to begin with. There cannot be a definite answer to the questions like,
What is the ultimate thing that you want to achieve with your life.
What is the farthest that you want to get in your life.
However, if one’s values are sound and priorities sorted out, it is surely possible to determine the general direction in one’s life. Let me elaborate on this point.
Assume that you are looking to go someplace that you really like. You know how the place ought to be but you don’t know where exactly it is. By eliminating the options it is possible to know the general direction. It is not hard to know if your interest lies towards NORTH.. SOUTH.. EAST or WEST. Now you have a heading. Take the first couple of steps in faith.
My point is, one can start by moving in the general direction of his/her interest. Over a period of time and journey in the right direction, the concept of ‘What I exactly Want’ starts to become more clear. Then you stand a higher chance of finding your destination.
This implies that the goals and aspirations are highly volatile concepts and are subject to change often. It further stands to logic that the ‘Ultimate Thing You Want to Do’ in life is not something like a lighthouse that is fixed. Its more like a flower floating on water that constantly changes its location. The only rational thing we can do is continually change our course to get there.
Now that’s a classic paradox. If your aspirations and goals were not fixed and are continually changing, why did we fret so much about the paths all along ?
I don’t know if we each have a destiny, or if we’re all just floating around accidental-like on a breeze. But I, I think maybe it’s both. Maybe both are happening at the same time.